A Guide to Setting Boundaries

boundaries people pleasing self-improvement May 22, 2024
A Guide to Setting Boundaries

I'm excited to share insights on a topic that's made a big difference in my life: setting boundaries. In a deep-dive conversation, I sat down with Melissa Wolak, an expert in boundary-setting.

Melissa highlighted that boundaries aren't just about saying nothey're a big yes to valuing our time and energy. It's not just what we say but how we act that shows we respect ourselves.

Finding Balance

Establishing and holding our boundaries is important, whether with family, friends, or co-workers. Setting clear boundaries creates better interactions. A big surprise for me was when Melissa said people get uneasy with uncertainty, so clarity about boundaries gives them a clear way to engage with us.

Tips for Setting Boundaries:

  • Define Your Priorities: Clearly outline what matters most to you in different areas.
  • Regularly Assess and Adjust: Life changes, and so should your boundaries. Regularly assess and adjust them as needed.
  • Communicate Clearly: Establishing clear boundaries leads to better interactions. Communicate your needs with clarity and assertiveness.
  • Spend Time with Yourself: Melissa's simple tip for discovering your needs is to spend quality time with yourself. Reflect on your feelings and tune into your intuition.
  • Start with Small Steps: If setting boundaries is new, start with small, manageable steps. It's okay to take it one step at a time.

Staying true to our boundaries, whether dealing with family or coworkers, is important. Life evolves, and so should our boundaries.

More Tips for Setting Boundaries:

  • Be Consistent: Consistency is key. Stick to your boundaries to build trust and understanding.
  • Use Silence Wisely: Silence can be a powerful tool in maintaining boundaries. Take a moment to breathe for strength.
  • Positive Communication: When setting boundaries, do so gracefully. Be clear and positive in your approach to foster understanding.
  • Affirmations for Self-Worth: Use affirmations to reinforce your self-worth, especially when setting new boundaries.

Set boundaries gracefully—be clear and positive.

Silence can help maintain boundaries. Take a moment to breathe for strength. Melissa gave me a mantra: "I respect and value my time and energy and attract others who do the same."

By valuing our time and energy, we build healthier relationships.

In summary, setting boundaries is empowering. Stand firm, repeat affirmations, and practice until it feels natural. 

Break Free from People-Pleasing

Setting boundaries is about creating a life filled with freedom and joy. I've created a resource to help you out with breaking your people-pleasing patterns, figuring out your boundaries, and learning how to communicate them.

When you purchase the People-Pleasing Masterclass Bundle, not only do you gain access to the entire interview with Melissa Wolak, but you also enjoy full access to:

  • A Whole New You Masterclass: This 30-minute video will lead you through the 5 Steps for Overcoming People-Pleasing and Over-Giving to Get the Heart-Centered Relationships You Deserve.
  • Effective Communication Workbook for People-Pleasers: Master the 6 Principles of Effective Communication and learn the 3-part assertiveness template with our practical 15-page workbook.

Ready to overcome the challenges of setting boundaries and reclaim control over your life? Start Here.

Join the Creating Soulful Relationships Community

Join this group to discuss your most pressing relationship issues. Find support and advice and learn how to love better to have the Soulful Relationship you want and deserve.


Saying it Right: Your Guide to Confident Communication

Subscribe to my mailing list to get your FREE copy!

We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.