As a people-pleaser, you may constantly prioritize others' needs above your own, often at the expense of your well-being. This pattern can lead to resentment, burnout, and strained relationships.

However, a powerful concept can help you strike a balance: loving detachment.

What is Loving Detachmen...

Many years ago I was at a self-development conference and the speaker said, “The quality of your life will depend on the amount of uncertainty you can tolerate.”

That quote stuck with me. I attended the conference in the early days of grad school and I often thought about how my anxiety would go up...

Turn your overthinking into self-reflection and overcome your people-pleasing habit.

If you are a people-pleaser, one of the things you do is overthink. 

• You think about what others think of you a lot.
• You worry whether someone is upset with you a lot.
• You ruminate on how you could have done s...

Recently, the teenage daughter of a client of mine accused her mother of holding a grudge against her grandmother (my client’s mother). My client had a difficult relationship with her mother and had, over the course of her therapy with me, set up various rules she enforced frequently because of her ...

Dear Dr. Julie: My husband of 43 yrs has worked most of our marriage away from home: here for 2 weeks and gone for 2-3 months. I pretty much raised our 3 children alone. He retired in 2018 and has gone from being away from home most of the time to being home almost ALL the time. Has prioritized self...

Dear Dr. Julie: My husband is throwing his anxiety on me. How do I change this? Thank you!!

--Anxious Annie

Dear Anxious Annie: This is one of my most frequent questions. People really struggle around how not to be so affected by other people's emotions.

When our partners, friends, or family memb...